Attaching Yourself To Someone Is Much More Painful Than Letting Go

Instead of attaching yourself to someone, you have to learn to let go even if you are alone. We need to understand that we only need ourselves to be well.

Attaching yourself to someone for fear of loneliness, losing what you’ve fought so hard for can cause you a lot more pain than if you let go of the person you are with.

You have certainly been taught to struggle to keep your relationships. Your mind has thus been forged with phrases such as  “you are not giving totally” or “you have to give 200% of yourself if you want to rekindle the spark”.

But what is the use of enduring so much suffering? What are you afraid of ? Imagining yourself far away from this person makes you panic. However, you don’t know how extremely liberating it can be.

Attaching yourself to someone and resisting change always causes pain

Changes involve stepping outside of our comfort zone, changing our lives and taking a new course. It is very scary and for this reason we always believe that it is better to stay in the same situation.

However, becoming attached to someone out of fear indicates that we stay with that person so as not to face our fears and not out of love.

It is not fair, neither to us nor to the other person. We will live in a lie, in a hypocritical relationship where, instead of moving forward, we are going to take big steps backwards.

Anxiety, stress, recriminations and conflicts will become more and more present, which is completely normal! Because we are not where we want to be, even if we believe in it.

Very often, this fear of the uncertainty of change is the result of certain beliefs that block us. Because when a relationship changes, what comes to mind?

That the spark has disappeared, that we must fight to recover the love of before which now is rather vague… We do not want to be alone, this is the real reality.

Because love failures are not well received.

The eternal fairy tale summed up in this sentence “they lived happily and had many children”

Becoming attached to someone indicates that these stories told in our childhood have left a deep imprint on us.

We keep dreaming about this happy ending, which is why we avoid changing, releasing, and altering anything in our relationships. We want this to last a lifetime …

However, this only happens in couples’ relationships. In friendly relationships, for example, we know that friends come and go.

Even if it hurts us, we do not feel this attachment that we have woven with our partner.

“You are my other half”, “without you I am nothing”, “I don’t know what I would do if I hadn’t met you”, “you make me very happy”…

All these sentences refer to the fear of letting go and the need to stay attached to our partner in order to be able to live this unreal story of princes and princesses.

We hurt ourselves, we suffer by attaching ourselves and staying with each other only out of fear.

Sometimes our fear is so great that we may experience relationships so that we don’t feel alone or feel that we have failed in our attempt to find that person who completes us.

Don’t be afraid to let go but learn not to depend on anyone

Don’t be afraid to let go, to be with yourself. Before you started this relationship, you were on your own and it wasn’t the end of the world, was it?

However, once you step into this world of emotions, relationships, dreams, it seems like being alone is no longer a possibility. Because time goes by and maybe you won’t find anyone who loves you.

All of these thoughts are the result of the immense fear that we have of changes that make us believe that “it is all over”.

Even though it’s easy to tell yourself that if you feel bad you don’t have to stay in that situation, you have to go through this learning.

You have to experience the pain of every disappointment in your flesh. We must fight the wrong way once again to save already broken relationships.

Conclusions about becoming attached to someone

You can see that you don’t have to get attached to someone. You will go through this ordeal, it will hurt you, but you will learn that sometimes it is necessary to let go.

So letting go is the most liberating thing there is. Getting attached to someone is the result of a fear that you can overcome.

In the end, you will be able to detach yourself and be happy without depending on anything or anyone. I wish you a successful experience.

Images of Katharina Jung

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